UPDATE! Penguin presentation postponed to a later date. Instead, geomorphologist J. Toby Minear will tell us about how he gets to shoot lasers at the earth—and may even shoot some at us—in his talk “Lasers! Pew Pew! Trees, rocks, lasers, and Radiohead in the weird weird world of point clouds.”

Thursday, September 23, 2010, at 7:30pm
The Rickshaw Stop
155 Fell St. @ Van Ness, SF
Cover charge $8
All ages, though parental discretion is most definitely advised.

From the cute to the slippery to the predatory, this month’s Nerd Nite is pretty wild! (Also: get some hackable swag, courtesy of the Emmy Award-winning “The Big Bang Theory,” which is moving to Thursday nights, 8 pm on CBS. New night, new time, same theory!)

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“Penguins: The True Chicken of the Sea” by Brooke Weinstein

Despite being almost universally loved, penguins are easy to parody. They walk funny and we laugh at them when they trip. They look like they’re wearing tuxedos, so we dismiss them as all being the same. They’re birds, but they’re fundamentally different from all other birds. Biologist Brooke Weinstein will take us beyond the caricatures and explain the basic peculiarities of these fascinating creatures

Bio: Brooke Weinstein is an aquarium nerd and aquatic biologist at the California Academy of Sciences. At work Brooke is responsible for a portion of the freshwater collection, including the freshwater stingrays and the 110,000 gallon Amazon Flooded Forest Display, which she likes to dive in as much as possible. She also spends a good bit of time caring for the Academy’s African penguin colony while trying, sometimes successfully, to be the biggest penguin.

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“One Fish, Two Fish, Eat Fish, Sue Fish” by Kate Wing

In the beginning, there was an ocean full of fish. Tasty, tasty fish. Where have they gone? Watch as a Pacific red snapper is transformed into mathematical equations, travels to Capitol Hill, and ultimately ends up in your fish taco. Learn about density dependence, the importance of big females, and judges who read Superman comics. Our guide tonight is a special breed of wonk-nerd hybrid, who takes science across enemy lines and onto the political battlefield.

Bio: Kate Wing started her career as a phycologist (that’s algae) before moving up the food chain to work in the U.S. Senate. She holds a master’s degree in marine affairs and serves as an advisor to the Pacific States Marine Fisheries Commission. After nine years of working on California fisheries she joined a foundation so she could fly back to DC a lot. She likes window seats.

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“PUAs, HBs and AMOGs, Oh My!: An Introduction to Pickup Artistry” by GK

Pimpin’ ain’t easy, which is why an Internet subculture of very nerdy dudes developed a set of methods and terminology aimed at seducing the fairer sex. And no, they don’t all revolve around canned lines and furry hats. We bring in a former San Francisco social coach—one of the aforementioned “very nerdy dudes”—to reveal the good, the bad, and the ugly of picking up women, from the first hello to getting her number. By the way, do you come here often?

Bio: Women didn’t come easily to GK, but sports did. San Francisco-born and Los Angeles-raised, he has spent most of his career as a sports journalist. After finally getting his groove on with the ladies in his late twenties, GK (just call him Greg) spent the last few years as the San Francisco-based instructor for Charisma Arts, teaching shy guys like him how to meet attractive girls and improve their social lives. He’s mostly retired from coaching now, but still enjoys sharing his thoughts on his blog, www.gkdating.com. He is currently married to his guitar, Joan.

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Plus: DJ Alpha Bravo returns, spinning an eclectic array of nerdy tunes. Some of you clever kids noticed Alpha Bravo’s sets are tightly-themed around our presenters’ topics. We now display a real-time playlist on the stage to loop the rest of you in on the fun. Alpha Bravo is VP of left-field pop label Radio Khartoum and was one of the forces behind legendary SF pop club nights Anisette and Schokolade.

Nerd Nite – “It’s like the Discovery Channel… with beer!”